Episode 104: The True Cost of Conflict Avoidance
How to Stop Avoiding Challenging Conversations and Start Saving Time, Money, and Your Sanity
According to employee-resource startup Bravely, 70% of employees are avoiding difficult conversations in the office. Those circumvented communications with their boss, colleagues, and direct reports may provide temporary relief, but it’s having a huge impact on the emotional and financial health of the workplace.
Read the full blog here: https://wp.me/pbfa13-HU
Episode 103: Achievement Planning - Four Steps to Success
Have you ever said any of these things to yourself?
"I'm lazy."
"I always get distracted."
"Something always comes up and gets in my way."
Here's the truth...
You are not lazy, but you may be lacking clarity and passion.
You are not distracted, but things will always come up and distract you (56 times a day to be exact) and what you think is a goal may not that important to you.
You have been and can be successful, but you may be afraid of what's on the other side of the story you're telling yourself.
Lauren breaks down the four steps to achieve your goals and knock out excuses and distractions.
Have you ever said any of these things to yourself?
"I'm lazy."
"I always get distracted."
"Something always comes up and gets in my way."
Here's the truth...
You are not lazy, but you may be lacking clarity and passion.
You are not distracted, but things will always come up and distract you (56 times a day to be exact) and what you think is a goal may not that important to you.
You have been and can be successful, but you may be afraid of what's on the other side of the story you're telling yourself.
Lauren breaks down the four steps to achieve your goals and knock out excuses and distractions.
Watch the video here: https://youtu.be/_MwijQDe_H8
Read the full blog here: https://spitfireinstitute.com/2020/02/10/achievement-planning/
Episode 102: Addressing Your Labels
Where are labels showing up in the way you think about the people around you? How about how you think about yourself?
Lauren uncovers the hidden dangers of labels especially the ones that you may think are compliments.
Where are labels showing up in the way you think about the people around you? How about how you think about yourself?
Lauren uncovers the hidden dangers of labels especially the ones that you may think are compliments.
Episode 101: The Energy Scorecard
Ever feel like you're saying yes to things that you wish you didn't?
What if you had a tool to help you process decisions in a clear and objective way?
Introducing The Energy Scorecard, a five step process to help you see the impacts of your potential activities.
Ever feel like you're saying yes to things that you wish you didn't?
What if you had a tool to help you process decisions in a clear and objective way?
Introducing The Energy Scorecard, a five-step process to help you see the impacts of your potential activities.
Spitting Fire: Your Guide to Reignite and Maintain Your Passion at Home, Work and Beyond
Episode 100: Pay Attention to Your Corners
Are you surface cleaning or scratching the surface of your issues? What have you been pushing to the corners and ignoring?
Lauren shares her experience with acknowledging and addressing the clutter in the corner.
How a trip to the salon triggered a huge life lesson.
Yesterday I decided to cut my hair for the first time. I had been resisting for a while but couldn’t endure the crunchy crinkles of my split ends. So, I made an appointment at a hair salon chain that I had gone to several times before for a trim and blow dry.
I was ready for my day of self-care.
Now this isn’t about soaking up the pampering and relishing in my new fresh do — that would be far too simple and trite.
The universe had far more in store for me.
You see, before all of this, I asked for a grand gesture for my 100th podcast episode. I didn’t want to do a fluff piece or an interview — I wanted a deep topic. I had ideas pop up, but nothing stuck, until I saw it unfolding and blowing up in my own face.
As a coach, I hear things that people hold back from everyone else in their life. They trust me with the most sensitive of topics and lean on me to help them through the process. I love my job. I am honored to do my job. But I was fooling myself.
I had convinced myself that I wasn’t affected by the heavy topics. I was meditating and working out and eating well. I thought that was enough. And then I walked into the salon.
After a thorough explanation of the services and procedures, I melted into the wash bowl where I was treated to a majestic head massage. I was like puddy in her hands.
I floated back to the chair as the shedding of inches began.
As the hair dryer began, I glanced down at the sea of hair from me and other clients. An employee dressed in all black and a hair product apron began sweeping items from the middle into a sucking contraption. Then my eye began to scan the floor and it picked up on pockets of fair individual hairs.
And then the corners…
Layers of follicles from the past, dust bunnies and debris. I was horrified at first and then the light bulb went off.
This was my brain and my body. I had been focusing on the noticeable things — my image, my diet, my stamina — and was forgetting the things in the corners — the residual emotional baggage from every client, interaction and idea. I was only sweeping at the big stuff.
Today I went in for my monthly acupuncture appointment and was beyond distraught. I felt like I had been running an emotional gauntlet and had exploded at people closest to me.
We chatted about how I could clean out my corners. Sure she could give me a treatment, but I needed a plan to process and protect my corners. So we created a ritual of protection, selection and rejection. I had the choice to engage, absorb and conclude.
My logical brain had convinced me that I was already doing this, but my inner voice knew I had been skimming the surface.
When we create and maintain a ritual or routine, it becomes natural and expected when it is consistent and clear. My ritual is about deciding how much I want to take on and in and what process I want to do to change the course of an unexpected or less than ideal situation. Essentially how do I knowingly turn on and off the coach.
Coaching is what I do, but it doesn’t have to always be who I am. I am also a reality-tv binge watching, karaoke singing, sequin-wearing, terrible dad joke telling human being.
We are all human beings doing the best we can with what we have. When we can acknowledge the things we want to hide and embrace them as our truth, we can diminish the shame and blame around the topic.
All of that energy we used to stuff things away, all of that energy spent keeping an eye on it, all of that energy scanning for signs that someone else knows, what more could we do with all of that found energy?
One week later…
I gave myself a week after writing this piece to post to test out my ritual/routine. I decided to make my routine as easy as possible. (I recently read a Harvard Business Review article on small micro goals and it really works.)
Every morning I write in my journal for 2–5 minutes reflecting on my previous day, what I’m grateful for and what my intention for the day is. I then sit in quiet reflection and meditation for 5 minutes. Then I have my coffee and get to cranking. In between coaching sessions, I’ve also started washing my hands.
Why?
It’s flu season and even if I don’t see people for their interactions, it’s a good practice to be in and there’s something about water. It cleanses and washes away the residual emotions that weren’t mine to begin with.
I’m already starting to feel the changes. I am less reactive, more present, more creative, and sillier. I recently went to a dinner that in the past has triggered anxiety, frustration and resentment. This time I enjoyed myself the entire time (2.5 hours!).
Next Steps
As you go about your day, what are 2–3 things you can do every day even in the busiest of times?
What can you do to honor yourself?
What can you do to take care of yourself?
If this is proving to be a challenge, what would your best friend suggest?
Track your progress (did you do it today?) and track your energy level(from 1–10).
Over time you’ll be able to see the truth and proof of your routine so much so that it becomes a ritual.
Episode 99: Using The Scaling Tool to Find the Gaps
Do you have new or shy employees who respond with "Good", "Fine" and "Ok" when you ask them how things are going?
Learn how the scaling tool can give you insight on confidence, blind spots, and opportunities within your organization.
Do you have new or shy employees who respond with "Good", "Fine" and "Ok" when you ask them how things are going?
Learn how the scaling tool can give you insight on confidence, blind spots, and opportunities within your organization.
Episode 97: Listen to This Before Making Your New Years Resolution
Do your New Years Resolutions sound amazing and achievable in January, but become a distant memory or feel like a chore in March?
Do your New Years Resolutions sound amazing and achievable in January, but become a distant memory or feel like a chore in March?
Today's episode will support you in making reasonable and realistic goals that will help you shift your mindset and behavior.
Episode 96: SpitFire Spotlight - Brett Snyder, Founder & CEO, Knucklepuck Media
Brett Snyder is the founder and CEO of Knucklepuck. Snyder built Knucklepuck with a holistic digital philosophy, assembling a team of experts in SEO, Paid Media, Content Marketing and Web Development that is uniquely positioned to adapt to clients’ evolving business needs.
Brett has deliberately executed a growth plan for Knucklepuck that is aligned with client success; Knucklepuck will always be held accountable to client business objectives, tying the company’s success with client successes. Following this simple model, Knucklepuck has grown from a one-man operation to a 15-person outfit and earned the distinction as Arlington’s Fastest Growing Company in 2017.
Episode 95: Are Support Groups Really Supporting You?
It seems like every week there is a new support or women's empowerment group popping up, but what if those groups were actually keeping you stuck?
Lauren dives into the undercurrent of female support group and gets curious on whether they're helping or hindering true growth.
It seems like every week there is a new support or women's empowerment group popping up, but what if those groups were actually keeping you stuck?
Lauren dives into the undercurrent of female support group and gets curious on whether they're helping or hindering true growth.
Episode 94: Low Lift, High Impact
Want to feel more productive and effective? Start with the low hanging fruit with the highest impact.
Lauren walks through the Low-Lift, High-Impact process that has helped her clients prioritize their day and to-do list.
Want to feel more productive and effective? Start with the low hanging fruit with the highest impact.
Lauren walks through the Low-Lift, High-Impact process that has helped her clients prioritize their day and to-do list.
Want more tools? Grab a copy of Prioritization Hacks: 5 Key Tools to Maximize Your Day
Episode 93: The Power of Gratitude
Let's Make a Daily Gratitude Pledge for November
Here's some inspiration to achieve a daily gratitude practice:
1) Say thank you to a co-worker, stranger, friend and/or family
2) Send a note of appreciation to a colleague at work
3) Share an experience with someone that showed up for you
4) Express what you see in other people that you admire
5) Make cookies and write a special note for a friend
6) Call a friend and sing the "Golden Girls" theme song
7) Keep a daily gratitude log without repeating for 30 days
8) Accept help that is offered and thank them
9) Look for the little wins
10) Seek the lessons even when things don't go your way
Submit your log on December 1st to receive a special gift
Episode 92: SpitFire Spotlight: Holly Harper, Founder, Blue Bike Communications
We’re geeking out on all things marketing with the founder of Blue Bike Communications, Holly Harper.
Hear about the current trends in digital marketing for small business and how you can incorporate simple practices to make a huge impact.
Check out Holly and Blue Bike at www.choosebluebike.com
We’re geeking out on all things marketing with the founder of Blue Bike Communications, Holly Harper.
Hear about the current trends in digital marketing for small business and how you can incorporate simple practices to make a huge impact.
Check out Holly and Blue Bike at www.choosebluebike.com
Episode 91: Micro-Goals for 2020 Vision
Do your goals feel impossible to achieve?
Do you wish you could feel the motivation and inspiration to get going on your goals today?
Do you wish you had more clarity around goals?
Consider your wish granted on today's episode!
Lauren walks you through the three levels of goal-setting and how to create micro-goals that will allow you to feel more accomplished, inspired and successful throughout the year.
Do your goals feel impossible to achieve?
Do you wish you could feel the motivation and inspiration to get going on your goals today?
Do you wish you had more clarity around goals?
Consider your wish granted on today's episode!
Lauren walks you through the three levels of goal-setting and how to create micro-goals that will allow you to feel more accomplished, inspired and successful throughout the year.
Episode 90: The 4 Ps to Prevent the Dreaded Task Stack
Do you feel like you're in meetings all day long and don't have enough time to get your action items done?
Learn the 4Ps that can help you surpass the dreaded Task Stack.
Do you feel like you're in meetings all day long and don't have enough time to get your action items done?
Learn the 4Ps that can help you surpass the dreaded Task Stack.
Episode 89: SpitFire Spotlight: Sara Lingenfelter, CEO, Virtual Biz Partner
Sara Lingenfelter, business mentor + systems guru, and CEO of Virtual Biz Partner joins me for this month's SpitFire Spotlight! We're talking all things Virtual Assistants - or VAs for the cool acronym-speaking folk.
Sara wanted to live in a world where people can work from home while also having time and flexibility for their family and passion. Sara's life changed in 2011 after turning down the career she always planned for in Probation and Parole. She realized she wanted to work from home to have time with her son, and be in control of her future.
She then became a Virtual Assistant and eventually a Certified Online Business Manager. Over the years, she's supported hundreds of clients with implementing systems and simplifying their businesses to realize healthy, successful growth. Now, she provides training that empowers moms to start their journey of becoming a virtual assistant.
Sara Lingenfelter, business mentor + systems guru, and CEO of Virtual Biz Partner joins me for this month's SpitFire Spotlight! We're talking all things Virtual Assistants - or VAs for the cool acronym-speaking folk.
Sara wanted to live in a world where people can work from home while also having time and flexibility for their family and passion. Sara's life changed in 2011 after turning down the career she always planned for in Probation and Parole. She realized she wanted to work from home to have time with her son, and be in control of her future.
She then became a Virtual Assistant and eventually a Certified Online Business Manager. Over the years, she's supported hundreds of clients with implementing systems and simplifying their businesses to realize healthy, successful growth. Now, she provides training that empowers moms to start their journey of becoming a virtual assistant.
Episode 88: Cleaning up the Clutter
3 years ago I put on an event called The Spring Cleaning Summit. It was all about clearing our mind, body, soul and space to allow new opportunities to enter in.
Today I was inspired to revisit those themes: how to honor certain items and how to embrace the power of letting go as I downsize yet again from a 395 sq ft apartment to sharing 750 sq ft with my boyfriend.
It's time to get curious about your stuff!
Episode 87: Own Your Sh*t: Lessons Learned from a Weekend Retreat
I was recently reminded of a quote from Brene Brown that really stuck out to me:
"The greatest barrier to belonging is fitting in."
This past weekend I participated in a women's retreat and was triggered by that feeling of not fitting in. I felt different and uncomfortable, but instead of bailing, I tried something new.
I was recently reminded of a quote from Brene Brown that really stuck out to me:
"The greatest barrier to belonging is fitting in."
This past weekend I participated in a women's retreat and was triggered by that feeling of not fitting in. I felt different and uncomfortable, but instead of bailing, I tried something new.
Episode 86: Birthday Bummer
Do your birthdays bum you out?
Mine used to. I've had meltdowns, cried, screamed and refused to get out of bed. With a brother 2 years + 1 day older than me, I was used to sharing my special day and as an adult I added huge layers of expectations and pressures for the people around me to create an amazing experience.
Before the day even arrived, I was anticipating the disappointment and guaranteed let down.
This year I'm doing something different...
Episode 85: SpitFire Spotlight - Lesley Pyle, Founder of HireMyMom.com
Lesley Pyle is a pioneer in the work-from-home mom industry. In 1995 she founded HomeBasedWorkingMoms.com (HBWM.com) after the birth of her first child.
After serving her initial need to be at home and make a living, she realized there must be others out there just like her.
Her instincts, passion and ability to niche down has allowed Lesley to create clear solutions, platforms and dual offerings to small businesses and working moms.
Don't let her sweet demeanor fool you, Lesley is a SpitFire of solution-based power.
Check out Lesley and her company at www.hiremymom.com
Lesley Pyle is a pioneer in the work-from-home mom industry. In 1995 she founded HomeBasedWorkingMoms.com (HBWM.com) after the birth of her first child.
After serving her initial need to be at home and make a living, she realized there must be others out there just like her.
Her instincts, passion and ability to niche down has allowed Lesley to create clear solutions, platforms and dual offerings to small businesses and working moms.
Don't let her sweet demeanor fool you, Lesley is a SpitFire of solution-based power.
Check out Lesley and her company at www.hiremymom.com